Writing

Hi guys!

I’m hoping you are all happy, healthy and enjoying life? As you may have gathered from my previous post, apart from writing my books and short stories, I am covering some other topics – the first of which was in my last post about anxiety and panic attacks. These will be interspersed amidst other bits and pieces that cross my mind, alongside letting you know how the new books are coming along as I am aware how boring these sites can be if they only focus on the writer and their projects. (In truth, it also feels a little self-indulgent to be constantly banging on about my latest book!)

In my next post, I’ll be talking about how, as a parent, you can try to deal with things if your child self-harms. I’ve been talking to several people (all of whom have asked to remain anonymous) who have had to contend with this, some of whom coped admirably, others who fell apart.

In the meantime, if you need some advice on the subject, do take a look at the NSPCC site  and this site  also offers some practical advice.

To add to this (as if I didn’t have enough to do), I’ve also started a new blog that pokes a little fun at life in general. Take a look if you fancy a laugh. I’ve been reliably told these posts are making people literally laugh out loud, which is enough to bring a smile to my own face and gives me the impetus to continue. You can find the link here – and please, do leave me the odd comment if it makes you laugh. Feel free to share so others can find a little levity in their day.

Until next time,

Jill x

P.S: Here’s the link to Big Ted, the first in a series of Terrible Tales. It’s definitely not for kids, so don’t be fooled by the title.

Terrible Tales

Hello all!

Yes, I know it’s been a while since I last blogged  – snow, work and other commitments have prevailed and for that, I apologise.

I’ve been editing, writing and completing the day job ever since the New Year. Consequently, I now look like a member of the Walking Dead, the bags under my eyes have their own suitcases and any social life I once had flew out of the window long ago. I can’t see it coming back anytime soon, either.

Earlier this year, I was commissioned to write a selection of short stories that will be used countrywide for children’s SAT revision and testing and I am thoroughly enjoying writing them.

Big Ted

Added on to this is the new series of novelettes I have begun which is in direct opposition to the SAT children’s stories. This is a dark, twisted and somewhat warped series only for adults, coming under the series title of ‘Terrible Tales’. The first, ‘Big Ted’, is due for release very, very soon and don’t be lulled into a false sense of security by the cover.

It’s the first book I’ve written that necessitates a trigger warning as the subject matter in this first story is somewhat sensitive. I’ll be sharing the link as soon as it is released, but you have been warned!

In the meantime, here’s a link to the latest book I edited:  https://www.amazon.co.uk/MARCO-OBSESSION-BAD-BILLIONAIRE-Book-ebook/dp/B07BR4VYJG

If you like a decent bad boy, enjoy a damned good storyline and don’t mind a bit of rumpy-pumpy, you’ll be blown away by this book. I loved working on it!

So, until Big Ted is released, I’m hoping by the next time I write on here Spring will have well and truly sprung.

I am so over snow!

Jill x

Lumps, bumps, and Trouble at Christmas

Hi all!

This last month has been – well, let’s just say that different is a good descriptive word (that actually doesn’t really cover anything, much).

So what’s been going on? New Puppy (‘NP’) has started asking to use the great outdoors (aka our garden) as a toilet, unless, of course, we’re busy and not paying him attention wherein he’ll bypass the asking and simply carefully avoid all the pads and paper put down to catch his little ‘accidents’ and pee in the six square inches left uncovered, the defiant little sod!

He’s actually really bright – sits on command, lays down on command, plays fetch (and is learning to let go of whatever we’ve thrown for him so we can throw it again), comes to us when called (if we have something he wants… otherwise he’s great at cocking a deaf’un – think toddlers, pre-schoolers, school-age – hell, just about any age of kid in reality – or husband…).

He’s learned that if he pushes it in a certain way, his water bowl comes loose and when it’s empty he dislodges it and chucks it at our feet wearing a look of utter disdain that says, ‘See what you’ve made me do? Water me, now!’ He’s obviously seen me laughing at  ‘Simon’s Cat’.

All plants in the house are now raised from the floor – NP’s developed a penchant for digging out the mud and chucking it all over the floor which, despite him thinking differently, is not in the least amusing.

The cat’s slightly more tolerant of him. Now she sits at a height he can’t quite reach watching him with contempt as he goes nuts trying to get her to play with him (front paws down, bum in the air, wagging tail) – her tail twitches in annoyance and he reads it that she’s telling him he’s now her new best friend – until she’s had enough of his gentle persuasion and hisses at him like a demon and swipes out. (Claws retracted – she’s not evil.) Funnily enough, her growl is way louder and more dog-like than his – who knew? Yet, when both are hungry, she’ll wind around his legs while he licks her and they both delight in tripping us up while we rush to attend to their needs. I swear they share a look and snicker – every, damn time.

A few years ago we bought musical dogs as Christmas decorations (we inherited one, if truth be told, and bought the second because – well, just because). They look remarkably like NP and he finds them a bit freaky – possibly because one sings Slade and the other sings Wizzard. After the initial ‘What the hell?’ moment, he carefully ignored them until I went into the kitchen a day or so after we’d put them out and came back in to find him dragging one around by its Christmas hat. Slade now sounds like they’ve hit the bottle. Hard.

Health wise? Hmmn – I was punched by a student (not the best of days), and like many others, the sickness bug is currently visiting our house. Nuff said on that score.

Finally, my latest book for children has been released – it’s called ‘Trouble at Christmas’ and you can get a copy for your own ankle-biters kiddliwinks here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B077XN1GCV (if you’re in the UK), or here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B077XN1GCV (if you’re over the pond).

Make an author happy and read it with your kids in the build-up to the big day – they’ll thank you for it. And if you really want to make an author happy, please leave a review of the book.

‘Til next time, take care!

Jill

Trouble at Christmas

Mason doesn’t want to visit his grandparents this Christmas. His grandad never shows his face because he’s too tired, and Mason is convinced the real reason is that he doesn’t like him. But his grandad has a secret, one that Mason can’t know until he turns 18. But secrets have a way of being discovered, especially when there is one careless elf and a whole lot more who are ill…

Here’s a sneak peak of the first chapter:

The North Pole

Father Christmas sniffed and wiped away a tear.

“What on earth’s the matter with you now?” sighed Mrs. Claussen. “Honestly, it’s the same every year – you have to go to work, there’s no way out of it. So pull yourself together, get the elves to sort the reindeer out and get those presents on the sleigh before it’s too late.”

“It’s all right for you,” Father Christmas snapped. “You get to spend the happiest time of the year with our grandson while I’m out doing all the work. It would be nice to be able to see him open his presents is all I’m saying.”

“You didn’t say that when his mother was little, did you? Oh no! Then it was all, ‘See you later, try not to let her open them all in one go – wake me up on Boxing Day’, wasn’t it?” Mrs. Claussen put the finishing touches to the ribbons that surrounded the final gift she’d had the elves make for the boy. “There,” she said with satisfaction.

“That was because Christmas Eve was the only time I got away from you both,” Father Christmas muttered under his breath.

“I heard that, darling.” Mrs. Claussen put the gift to one side and thumped on the table with a small fist, making her husband jump. “If you’d only go into the real world more than once a year, you’d see more of both Mason and Lili, wouldn’t you!”

Father Christmas squirmed in his chair. “You know I can’t do that – I’d be too easily recognised.”

“Pah!” said Mrs. Claussen. “By who, exactly?”

“The children, of course!” Father Christmas stared at his wife in astonishment.

“The children who all think you’re a big, jolly fellow with white hair and a long white beard?” Mrs. Claussen raised an eyebrow.

Her husband was currently sporting a pair of jeans and a white tee-shirt with a rude slogan on it. He had been on a diet during this past year and had lost so much weight none of his Christmas clothes fitted him any longer. He’d also taken up weight lifting and running, shaved off his beard, cut his hair and dyed it a rather snazzy chestnut colour.

“I still think you’re having some kind of mid-life crisis,” she said, even as she admired his biceps.

“You have to be middle aged to have that kind of crisis,” her husband told her. “And as I’m only one-hundred and sixty-six…”

“Seven,” his wife corrected.

Father Christmas tutted. “Sixty-seven, then, I’m nowhere near the middle of my life, am I?”

“No,” Mrs. Claussen agreed. “Not unless you’re planning on living to three-hundred and thirty-four, you’re not.”

Father Christmas jumped to his feet, sending the kitchen chair he’d been sitting on skidding across the floor. “I’ve had enough of this!” he shouted.

“There’s a good fellow,” Mrs. Claussen ignored his mini-tantrum. “Go and put the toys on the sleigh.”

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

Due for release 5.12.2017 for less than the price of a cup of coffee.

Back to Writing

I’ve been so busy promoting other people’s work, editing, proofing (and completing the day job) that I failed to realise I haven’t posted anything about what I’m writing in a while.

Yes, I am still writing, in fact I have several on the go, but the one I’ve been asked to concentrate on is more in the vein of ‘Nan Nose Best’ in that it’s got romance, heartbreak, babies and comedy, all under one roof.

The characters are endearing, the story is realistic (in that this stuff could happen…) and you’ll (I hope) be rooting for Jenny to come out on top by the end.

I’m having a ball writing it and I hope you’ll enjoy it when it comes out, just in time for Valentine’s Day next year.

Here’s a sneaky look at a possible cover…

Free Fall (8)

If you’d like to read any of my other books in the meantime, please follow the links and make an author happy by buying one!

UK: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Jill-Turner/e/B0142S490M

USA: https://www.amazon.com/Jill-Turner/e/B0142S490M

‘Til next time – take care,

Jill